Men’s Mental Health at Work: We Made Corporate Men Drop the ‘Tough Guy Act’

How often have you had a male colleague open up to you about his mental health? Out of everything that we have normalized in the world, do you think we have successfully normalized discussing men's mental health in the workplace? I deeply feel that we haven't.

Men's mental health is often overlooked in corporate organizations. With about three years in the field, I feel it is more of a societal lag than an organizational one.

The Harvard Business Review Research shows that men are less likely to discuss their mental trauma or stress. This result is consistent regardless of their age, nationality, and race. It also highlights the fact that workplace stress affects men and women differently and their ways of coping with it.

This data sheds light on the 'Tough Guy' complex we have built around men. Men are taught not to express their emotions as freely as women. This creates a mental block and suffering. I have even witnessed organization heads who expect this from their male employees.

'The Tough Guy Act'- Why do Men Hesitate to Open Up About their Mental Health?

I am calling it the tough guy act. Yes, an 'Act' because deep down, men are also humans who feel the same emotions as women. In this context, I decided to survey 15 men I knew who were in the corporate field.

With a few follow-up questions to prepare the ground, I asked them what they feared most. Why do you think men hesitate to open up about their mental health? I came up with the following analysis from the survey-

1. Not Every Colleague Is a Friend

This was a major response to my survey. Five out of the 15 men said that they were not comfortable discussing their mental state with their colleagues.

Mental stability and wellness at work are paramount. Not finding a friend among colleagues may hit people very differently and adversely.

They also held up the view that mental health (especially men's mental health) is still a sensitive issue in society. So, they hesitate to discuss it with their colleagues who they do not trust.

2. Society Doesn't Expect Me to Be Sensitive

Almost every person I talked to admit this fact in some essence. It is truly concerning how much we have molded men into tough guys incapable of feeling emotions.

Almost half of the people were confident that their parents would not accept it. They even admitted that they are much happier reserving and suppressing their emotions in front of the crowd.

3. Opening Up Might Impact Employment

Employment has a far-reaching impact on individuals. This is what my research encompassed with men's mental health in the workplace. An individual has a protective approach to his or her job in 90% of the situations.

This led to my third analysis of results. Men also feel that opening up about their mental health to the management or any colleague might impact their employment. They are afraid it might even lead to them losing their job.

4. Responsibilities Barely Leave Room for Emotions

Some of the older men I talked to argue this harsh fact. They believed that their responsibilities towards their families mattered more than their emotions of anger, anxiety, or frustration.

I asked if their mental health at work gets in their way. They said that it has become a habit. Being a little frustrated or anxious at work now feels like a part of their daily job.

5. Masculine Pride

This was not a response from any of the 15 people I surveyed but a reference by some of them. More than one of them mentioned that either their parents or family member exhibited masculine pride.

This made them feel insecure, sharing their mental health issues with their parents. They further explained that they could confide in a friend. But, having inculcated this masculine pride in their minds from early childhood, they lacked confidence.

How Does Men's Mental Health Differ from Women's?

To get an expert opinion on this view, I spoke to psychologist Dr. Hira Barna Kakati. Dr. Kakati has been providing therapy and counseling to a different age group regarding various mental issues.

Dr. Kakati said that sex differences in mental illness and wellness do exist, and we choose to ignore them. The society teaches men to be tough and women to be gentle. This is invariably projected in their reaction to stressful stimuli.

According to Dr. Kakati, men are more likely to suppress or externalize their emotions. They can engage in aggressive, impulsive, and non-compliant behavior as a coping mechanism.

Women, on the other hand, tend to confide easily if they do not internalize their emotions. This can relieve them sometimes, but if kept to themselves, they feel lonely and depressed.

Apart from these categories, Dr. Kakati also mentioned that some men sometimes open up to others. However, their opening up to someone in the workplace is still unlikely.

Do you get more female patients than male patients?

"Of course," replied Dr. Kakati. According to her, approximately 70% of her patients are female.

She also said that the male patients she gets, open up to her completely. They show no pride, masculinity, or hesitation.

We have established that men's and women's reactions to the same stress stimuli, whether at work or outside, are different. Let's look at some ways these symptoms show up in men.

Some Behavioral Signs of Men's Mental Health in the Workplace

There are many signs and symptoms of men's mental health issues at work or outside. These differ from person to person depending upon their nature.

1. Lack of Concentration

Lack of concentration or focus and distraction is common in men with suppressed emotions. They binge-watch shows, spend hours scrolling social media, and decrease their work performance.

This can further lead to mental block at work that can have a severe impact. Therefore, it is necessary to address it in time.

Suggested Reading: 5 Ways to Overcome a Mental Block at Work.

2. Wrong Coping Mechanism

This sign is about coping with frustration or mental issues without telling anyone. They indulge in heavy drinking and drugging themselves.

3. Externalization

Externalization mostly refers to non-compliant or inappropriate behavior. This can include hyperactivity, fast anger, impulsive decisions, and sometimes even violence.

How Can Management or Employers Step in to Solve These Issues?

An insight from the survey I still haven't mentioned is that not every man may be open to accepting a solution. The catch is that until you convince them they are ill, they will not accept a fix.

However, in the interest of the workplace, management or superiors can step in on these issues in different ways.

The role of the society starting right at home and educational institutions to workplaces is to provide support to the male gender. Creating a safe space for them, motivating, and encouraging them to display their emotions can help amazingly.
- Dr. Hira Barna Kakati

Nurture an Environment of Openness

Dr. Kakati mentioned that the habit of opening up about emotions starts at the root level. Therefore, employees should be encouraged to speak up about their illness or wellness with a trusted person in the company, such as a counselor.

This is to assert and reassert the fact that opening up is a show of strong character and integrity.

Mention Your Own Struggles

What always works is leading by example and talking about your own vulnerabilities in a one-on-one setting. This helps the struggling person feel he is not alone.

The person in question may have dealt with masculine pride or toxicity. The manager or the employer talking about how they sought help will normalize the situation for him.

Promoting Work-Life Balance

An observer is supposed to remain neutral in a study. But I also have struggled with some issues myself when it comes to mental health in the workplace. Talking about it with my parents was one of the boldest steps I have ever taken.

But even in those conditions, having flexibility at my workplace with my work helped me a lot. Having to shift focus on balancing my life and my issues made me feel comfortable. This is an initiative every employer can take for their employees.

Suggested Reading: From Burnout to Balance: 5 Steps to Enhance Employee Wellness and Work-Life Balance

Training Managers on Spotting Men's Ill Mental Health

Research shows that men exhibit different signs of mental illness or work stress. To be able to cope with stress and anxiety is considered a masculine value.

Therefore, it is ideal that employers train their managing heads to spot men's mental health symptoms in the workplace. The manager must ensure that every member of the team is well enough to work.

My survey and my interview with Dr. Hira Barna Kakati helped me realize how hesitant men are in discussing their mental health. Even though the perspective is shifting now, we still have a long way to go.

Just by normalizing discussing mental health regardless of gender, we can take a big step forward. Men's mental health in the workplace will remain at risk until employers and managers encourage and empower them.

Online tools and platforms can help employers manage employees' health and wellness. These platforms help collect real-time health metrics and create healthy tasks to promote good health.

One such platform is Vantage Fit; an all-in-one employee wellness platform used by hundreds of employees worldwide. Book a demo with us today and check out the amazing benefits!

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Why is men's mental health overlooked?

Men's mental health is often overlooked because they themselves suppress their issues under the impression of a masculine pride.

2. Are men less prone to mental illnesses than women?

No, men and women are equally prone to mental problems. It is just that men find it hard to open up about them.

3. How do I talk to male employees about mental health without reinforcing stigma?

You can tell them about the confidentiality of the conversation. Help them realize that it is a safe place and it is normal to open up about these problems.

4. What are the benefits of addressing men’s mental health proactively in the workplace?

It brings equality to the workplace. It reduces burnout in men due to work as well as make them feel confident about their work and workplace.

5. What role do male leaders play in normalizing mental health conversations?

Male leaders in healthcare and mental healthcare set the benchmark for other men to open up too. They can help normalize the 'hype' about men having to act tough and help them heal.

References

1. Harvard Business Review Research